Sticker That Farang And Ship Him To Malaysia!

End of March, 2006

So, off I went on another trip from one place to the next. Traveling in Thailand is really easy in general, but the act of literally traveling is ridiculously simple. Very often a travel agent here will sell a "combination ticket" from A to B, which involves virtually door-to-door transport using a combination of methods and stages... sawnthang, taxi, motorbike, minibus, bus, van, ferry, pick-up truck, whatever! They don't really need to tell you how many legs your journey will have and what modes of transport will be used, and very often they don't bother. Usually they put coloured stickers on the farang (foreigner) cargo, so that they can direct the flow of their human traffic such that none of it gets lost in the system!

This results in a very efficient travel system, and they are very good at transporting people smoothly all over the mainland and islands. This is a good thing too, as tourism is one of the mainstays of the Thai economy. However, it does mean that travelers are almost encouraged NOT to think for themselves, as it is perfectly possible to buy a ticket from, say, an island in the Gulf of Thailand to another in the Andaman Sea, and not know the route, the ports used or even how many changes of land transport you have to make and where! Present yourself at one end of the system and you will be funneled through, processed and deposited out the other end! Although it's convenient in some ways, I sometimes wish it was a bit more transparent. Personally I like to know what sort of journey I'm in for, what I'm going in, roughly what the route is, how long it's going to take, etc. etc!

Anyway, I entered the tourist travel system in Koh Lanta, fully stickered-up so that I was spat out correctly in Pulau Langkawi, Malaysia! On the way I met Andrea, a freshly-graduated Seattle-ite traveling in southeast Asia before turning herself over to a life of business, (or whatever it is that people with degrees in Business Studies actually do). She was going to meet friends in Langkawi that she had just met on Koh Tao at the same time that I had been there. They came to meet her off the boat, and I ended up going to where they were all staying at the beach of Pantai Cenang.

Her friends, Tom, Haji, Zoe and Lara were two English couples from Chichester, all in their early/mid 20s and out here for a few months of travel. I ended up hanging out with them for the next week or so that I was in Malaysia.

The weather was still not what you'd hope for to go to the beach so we filled the time with other pursuits, renting motor scooters to drive around the island to visit a waterfall, Underwater World (a large aquarium), and a shopping centre. That really summed up Langkawi, as far as I could see. There seemed just to be lots of beach resorts, populated by couples on package holidays grumpily waiting out the spell of gloomy weather in order to return to their resort's stretch of beach. In the meantime, hey - it's not all bad - they could visit the waterfall, Underwater World, or go shopping!

I hadn't really ridden scooter before, but having taken one around the car park of the bungalows without major incident and quickly mastered the basics, I felt ready to take to Langkawi's smooth, empty, well-paved roads. They even drive on the left; how considerate! Riding a scooter is not unlike riding a bike but not having to peddle, (OK, I know there's more to it than that, but my mum reads this and I don't want her to worry).

I was however mindful of all the tourists I had seen with obvious scooter injuries, one of which is so common in Thailand amongst young backpackers that I had given it a name - Thailand Island Injury, (T.I.I.). Evidence of T.I.I. is a bandage on the inside of the right leg, about halfway down the calf. This is where the inexperienced biker hires a machine, rides it in shorts or a skirt and at some point puts their leg on the hot exhaust! Ouch, (not to mention the smell of singed flesh)! There was no danger of that with me though. Unlike on a proper bike, the exhausts of our safe little scooters were totally enclosed in bodywork.

The waterfall on Langkawi was more of a waterdribble, it being dry season, but the short hike up through the mountain woods to get to it was pleasant enough. You wouldn't have thought it was dry season though, from the drizzle and the low cloud we found ourselves in. The cablecar ride to the very top that we had been considering would clearly be pointless.

I quite enjoyed Underwater World. There were some pretty engaging exhibits, including sharks and turtles, although disappointingly the penguins were "under refurbishment", (I'm not quite sure how you do that). To make up for not having my dive course photos yet, I was able to take a pic of a moray eel that I had seen so often on my dives. They just sit there with their mouths open like this, either looking scary or gormless depending on your point of view.

The 3-D cinema at Underwater World was disappointing, however. They showed an underwater wildlife film in which, despite dutifully wearing the glasses, I could see no 3-D content at all except for maybe a little bit, a couple of times. Also , the banging techno that they played just before and just after the film was, perhaps, the most inappropriate choice of "background music" I think I have ever encountered! We thought we'd wandered into the aquarium club. Has anyone got any salmon? Cheers, sorted...

Having exhausted the possibilities of Pulau Langkawi, the six of us set off for the next Malaysian Island of Pulau Penang, a bit further south. I had begun to realise what a pain the logistics of six people traveling together is. Trying to get everyone to agree where to go, what to do when you're all there, getting cabs for six people, getting several rooms all at the same guesthouse, etc. etc. In some ways traveling on your own, with only your own opinion to take into consideration and only yourself to get from A to B, is so much easier.

On Pulau Penang we arrived in Georgetown which, (as you can probably tell from the name), was established by the British in the 18th century. It is an interesting town, mainly Chinese in population, and often felt like it was one big Chinatown. We stayed at a guesthouse run by a fantastic old Chinese man called Mr. Lo, who remembers every guest's name, dispenses maps and advice with inexhaustible enthusiasm and sings along, word-perfect, with the Deep Purple that he has playing in the foyer.

Our time was taken up with wandering town around town during the day, perhaps going to a nearby beach or sitting around a swimming pool at one of the bigger hotels, (the weather had cleared up by then). The evenings consisted pretty much of drinking, often spurred on by American college drinking games introduced by Andrea which were new to all the Brits...

Andrea herself was learning new things as well. When I commented on how the Malaysian flag resembles the stars and stripes, she said "oh" and then clearly had a small private revelation. It turns out that she thought the Malaysian flag, which we had been seeing hanging limply on flagpoles, car aerials and so on, actually was the stars and stripes! I didn't ask her why she thought she'd be seeing "Old Glory" fluttering over public buildings in Malaysia. Has Bush decided the USA needs to re-invade southeast Asia since I've been out here?!? Maybe Andrea knows something I don't...

As much as I was enjoying the new company, the best day I had in Malaysia was spent on my own, visiting Fort Cornwallis and the mansion of Cheong Fatt Tze, (The "Rockerfeller of the East"), meeting up with the others in the evening. The fort is full of old British statues, cannons, flags and so on, and gives an interesting account of its own history and that of the town. Of course, Mr. Dasje enjoyed the visit too...


So after six days I decided that my time in Malaysia was up. I had considered going further south to see Kuala Lumpar or the Cameron Highlands, but realised that I still had so much more that I wanted to see up north in Thailand, Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam. The world is very big, and in fact a year is not very long! So I said goodbye to the British/American party, who were heading south, while I got a train back up into Thailand.

Sun, Over There! Quick!! (Thailand)

Mid March, 2006

Fleeing the impertinent wet weather on Koh Tao, (how dare it rain on my year in the sun!), I found myself on a bus to the port of Krabi which is on the other side of the thin peninsula. My destination was the island of Koh Lanta, where I had no reason to believe the weather was any better but I was probably heading that way anyway - just a little sooner than I might have!

On the bus I met Mel, a Canadian dance teacher who was in Thailand for a few weeks and was also heading to Koh Lanta. Mel was heading out to the island the next morning, however I was planning to stay in Krabi for a couple of nights. I had business to attend to in Krabi; the serious matter of hair that hadn't been cut since December!

Those familiar with my habits know that I have my hair cut every three weeks to prevent it becoming an unruly stack, and that over the last thirteen or so years it has only been cut by two highly-trusted professionals, (hello Paul and Lee!). I had let it go so far on this trip out of a mixture of curiosity to let it grown long again, and trepidation at what an Indian/Thai haircut might entail. But since I was now starting to resemble Don King, or Henry from David Lynch's Eraserhead, it was definitely time to tame the barnet and I reckoned Krabi was a sufficiently large place for me to find a competent tamer! However, since "downtown Krabi" failed to impress either Mel or myself on the night we arrived, I decided that Koh Lanta must have at least one reasonable hair-cutting emporium, and so also left for the island the following morning.

Mel had in mind a place to stay which was at Klong Nin beach, halfway down the island and away from the main town and the busiest beach. We bargained with a moto taxi, and one quite long ride later installed ourselves at "Sunset Bungalows". We came across a little hairdressing business nearby and the nice Thai lady set about her task with brisk efficiency. My confidence in her abilities was buoyed up by the plethora of certificates on the wall, and the photos of her receiving what appeared to be prizes and awards, (although for all I knew these could have been for her ability to grow vegetables). The result was a relief - fussy boy here was happy with his clip. Mel joined in by getting a girly pampering pedicure.

The weather on Koh Lanta wasn't much better than Koh Tao and wasn't really what you'd call beachy, but it didn't stop me swimming in the sea, which was the standard Thai 30 lovely-degrees-Celsius! I swam through a couple of heavy rain showers; if you're in the water it doesn't really matter if it's raining above! The area around our beach seemed pretty quiet, which was what we were looking for. However, since this was my first visit to a place affected by the tsunami in 2004, I wondered if tourists were assuming that it would be a mess and staying away. As far as I could see, any damage on our part of the island had been pretty much cleared up.

Mel's friend Canadian Kate arrived, and we spent a couple of nights on Klong Nin beach before they took off north for a trip living on a boat for three days, diving in the Similan Islands. We had planned for me to go too but there weren't enough places left on the boat, so I decided to go on a trip leaving a week or two later. Mel was into making hemp jewelry, and sat down on the beach one evening to make me a really nice ankle bracelet.

So after a few days I found myself yet again fleeing somewhere to try to outrun the drizzly weather! This time I headed south to Malaysia. I had decided to expand my plans to see a little of that country while I was nearby, and anyway my 30-day Thai visa was running out so I needed to nip across the border...

Just Remember To Keep Breathing... (Thailand)

Mid March, 2006

I arrived on Koh Tao, a little island in the gulf of Thailand, having already selected a diving centre from the thirty or so outfits which operate on the island. Koh Tao has a reputation for not only some of the best diving in Thailand, but also some of the cheapest. At 9300 Baht (about 140 GBP), my 4-day PADI Open Water Course was going to get me the qualification cheaper than if I went to Koh Phi Phi or Koh Lanta on the other side of the peninsula.

I arrived, checked in and straight away was introduced to my instructor, Annika from Finland, and the others on the course: Matts, David and Simon from Sweden, and Veibeke from Norway. The next day at 9 a.m. we went straight into the pool! A quick swimming test, (14 lengths), and a treading water exercise, (10 min), quickly reminded me that I could be fitter and also that I am quite dense and prone to sinking.

So we quickly learned about the gear and then it was time to breathe underwater. No matter how much you understand about how it all works, it still takes a leap of faith to put the mask on, put the regulator in your mouth, put your head underwater and try to take in a big lungful of what you hope will be air, not water. But air it is, (assuming you've cleared your regulator of course!), and breathe you indeed can. Having crossed that threshold, you start to see the possibilities of this neat little trick!

The next few days were spent covering theory in the classroom, followed by going out on the boat to learn skills in the open ocean. Having only decided to learn to dive a few days before, (I'd previously had no long-standing desire to do it like some of my fellow students), I had quickly come to realise how addictive diving can be. At one point on my second dive I rounded the corner of a large rock wall to find that the ocean floor fell away dramatically into a deep canyon below me, and at that point I realised what this experience was like. It was like flying under your own power, just gently kicking your legs to soar along and surveying the landscape below. It was just incredible.

So after four days at Asia Divers I received my PADI Open Water qualification, which makes me a "qualified diver" and able to dive for fun anywhere I like, (within certain limits). However, I had loved the experience so much that I stayed on to do my Advanced Open Water qualification straight away. This involved making five more dives, and getting instruction in the areas of deep water diving, photography, peak performance buoyancy, underwater navigation and night diving!

The night dive was a very different experience to a day dive. You see different sea life at night, such as the very large sleeping trigger fish we saw wedged into his crevice. During the day they are very territorial, and chase and bite divers who stray into their patch, but we managed not to wake him with our torches! Also you see the colours of the ocean differently by torchlight than by filtered daylight. The colours are much more vivid, with the red end of the spectrum being particularly stronger as that is the part of daylight that gets progressively more filtered out by water the deeper you go.

The deep water dive was also interesting, and involved a nitrogen narcosis test. At around 30m or so, the increased dissolved nitrogen content in a diver's blood can induce a narcotic effect which impairs judgement and can make the diver act strangely. We tested this by timing each of us performing a simple task at the surface, then again at 30m. We all managed to take much longer to do it, but more tellingly thought that it was incredibly funny that we were all taking longer to do it! The effect goes when you ascend.

The photography dive was excellent, although I still haven't received the pictures from the dive centre's digital camera. Never trust a dive instructor to get it together to do anything other than dive! Although often likeable, they do tend to have a "mañana" mentality about everything else. I took this fish pic with a waterproof disposable camera on another dive. My dive buddy, (you always dive in pairs), took these other two of me jumping in and making bubbles. Anyway, I found that underwater photography is tricky; there are lots of things to think about at once, especially as an inexperienced diver!

My diving courses on Koh Tao ended with another novel experience - rain. Having not seen a drop of it in the two and a half months since leaving England, I was surprised that the sound I heard outside my bungalow one afternoon was not the gardener hosing the lawns! As anyone who has visited the English seaside knows, beachy environments are no use to man nor beast in the rain! So I decided to flee west across the Thai/Malay peninsula to see if the climate was more hospitable on the island of Koh Lanta...